my new fave songs (lyrics)

Angel Cry Lyrics

Mariah:

I shouldn't have walked away

I would've stayed if you said

We could've made everything OK

But we just

Threw the blame back and forth

We treated love like a sport

The final blow hit so low

I'm still on the ground

I couldn't have prepared myself for this fall

Shattered in pieces curled on the floor

Super natural love conquers all

'Member we used to touch the sky

And

Lightning don't strike

The same place twice

When you and I said goodbye

I felt the angels cry

True love's a gift

We let it drift

In a storm

Every night

I feel the angels cry

C'mon babe can't our love be revived

Bring it back and we gon' make it right

I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive

As the angels cry

Ne-Yo:

I thought we'd be forever and always

You were serenity

You took away the bad days

Didn't always treat you right

But it was OK

I do somethin' stupid

And you still stay with me

But you can only go for so long

Doing the one you claim to love wrong

Before too much is enough

You look up

Find your love gone

And

We were so good together

How come we could not weather

This storm and just do better

Why did we say goodbye

'Cause lightning don't strike

The same place twice

When you and I said goodbye

I felt the angels cry

True love's a gift

We let it drift

In a storm

Now every night

I feel the angels cry

Mariah & Ne-Yo:

C'mon babe can't our love be revived

Bring it back and we gon' make it right

I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive

As the angels cry

Baby I'm missin' you

Don't allow love to lose

We gotta ride it through

I'm reaching for you

Baby I'm missin' you

Don't allow love to lose

We gotta ride it through

I'm reaching for you

Lightning don't strike

The same place twice

When you and I said goodbye

I felt the angels cry

True love's a gift

But we let it slip

In a storm

Every night

I feel the angels cry

Oh babe, the angels cry

_____________________________________________________

I Want To Know What Love Is Lyrics

I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when Im colder

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Cant stop now, Ive traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what love is.....
I want you to show me......
I wanna feel what love is.....
I know you can show me......

I'm gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me....
Ive got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me....

In my life! there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
I cant stop now, Ive traveled so far
To change this lonely life!.!.!.!.

I wanna know what love is.....
I want you to show me......
I wanna feel what love is......
I know you can show me......

I wanna know what love is....
I want you to show me....
And I wanna feel, I want to.... feel what love is....
And I know, I know you can show me....

show me

I wanna know what love is, lets talk about love
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me love is real, yeah
I wanna know what love is...

__________________________________________________

Always lyrics
This Romeo is bleedin'
But you can't see his blood
It's nothing but some feelings
That this old dog kicked up

It's been rainin' since you left me
Now I'm drownin' in the flood
You see I've always been a fighter
But without you I'll give up

I can't sing a love song
Like the way it's meant to be
I guess I'm not that good anymore
But that's just me

I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always

Now your pictures that you left behind
Are just memories of a different life
Some that made us laugh, some made us cry
One that made you have to say goodbye

What I'd give to run my fingers through your hair
Touch your lips and hold you near
When you say your prayers understand
I've made mistakes, I'm just a man

When he holds you close, he pulls you near
When he says the words you've been needin' to hear
I wish I was him with these words of mine
To say to you till the end of time

That I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always

If you told me to cry for you, I could
If you told me to die for you, I would
Take a look at my face
There's no price I won't pay
To say these words to you

I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always

I'll be there till the stars don't shine
Till the heavens burst and words don't rhyme
And I know when I die you'll be on my mind
And I'll love you always

someone said....

just today...when i was talking to a friend of mine..and when i told him about the good thing that happened to me yesterday (9-22-10)..he was actually saying that "i knew all along that you've got that potential in you..well goodluck with that..", he added some thing..well that was awkward...but here it is "you know when your ex will see you..(about that achieving dream thing)..he will beg for you to get back together..coz if im just available..i will take you out"...can you believe that?...well anyway..i just dont believe in that..its just a joke..thats what friends do to keep your friend smiling...

i dont know but maybe he's right..he told me that.."because its been you're dream since high school, you cant back out now..now that u already have the opportunity...i know that they found some thing in you..and you got what they wanted..u have the potential to be where you want"..inspiring, isnt it?...

its been so long...and finally..

my friends and my classmates often see me smiling...but not really happy...this week, just this week...i finally got the opportunity to achieve my dreams...surprisingly, i didn't expect that it will be the result..but i did it..good thing i was prepared....you know it has always been my dream...

i kept it secret...but then..because i was chosen to be in the list..i wanna tell the whole world about what happened..i mean...what really happened....i am happy that i was chosen..and im glad that i took that opportunity...im not gonna tell everyone about this..coz i know that they wont believe in it..

i guess i've changed..well, i knew all along that i really have to change...i want a new life..new people in my life..people i wanna care about..set priorities..dont go beyond any limits which i can't fight for..meaning?..i have to set aside love life first..clearly..its not yet my time..im not yet ready for any commitment..

for a long time..even though i was hurt..i was actually smiling..and im glad that it did happen...its one thing that i've gotta realize that if i just open my eyes..and forget all my needs and wants..i felt happier..even though im just looking in the strangers around me..when i take a look at their facial expressions..i just..i feel different...and this..this had shocked me...(really)..i was in a jeep..there was a girl with a baby with her..and i dont know why but the baby was staring at me..(eye-to-eye)..and i saw how cute that baby was..the skin..the cheeks..those tiny hands..i was actually smiling at the baby..and im guessing the baby was looking at me in curiosity..

i dont know..i just felt strange this past few days...and im really having lots of opportunities...like my dream..(which i've always wanted to achieve since high school)..a job that's waiting for me(just one prob, my mom wont let me go..she doesnt want me to be homesick..)..i finally knew who my real friend is..(a real one..really)...i just..felt satisfied...

i keep on telling myself the day that i was hurt...that..i dont need a bf...(and there was this song that's stuck in my head "i dont need a man" by pcd)...i got other priorities in life..there are lots of things i still wanna do..i wanna have an adventure..i wanna travel and run away from here..just like that...

there are lots of people that i could talk to..and i know that they'd understand if i just try to open myself up a bit...im just so secretive..and i cant blame anyone for that(in fact im just so thankful to everything that had happened in my life)...

there are still lots of things going on out there..and i wanna know what it is...i wanna learn something new..do what interests me the most...i just realized that im capable of doing anything...(like that big dream of mine)..i wanna know how to cook different dishes..i wanna ride a bike(yeah im not kidding i dont know how to ride a bicycle)..i wanna make my own clothes(fashion designs)..interior design..hmmm what else?...i cant say much about those interests right now...

wew! its been a lovely day today..even though im really exhausted..i feel happier than ever before...

its time to let go..

how would you react when your special someone is making you feel like he doesn't love you anymore?..you saw him on day..and you noticed the signs that HE'S NOT INTO YOU ANYMORE, YOU DONT MATTER ANYMORE, YOU WORTH NOTHING TO HIM ANYMORE...how would you react?

i have been keeping all the memories..keeping it safe..but then..if its giving me pain..if its making me miss him and see him again..ITS TIME TO LET GO..that moment when i was mad at myself, for the first time in my life..i didnt realize that i was already throwing things in my room..i hurt myself..i was bleeding already..good thing my mom and dad wasnt home..as secretive as i am..i hide my wound..and im sure no one will notice it..

what's the good thing that happened to me at that time?..i finally got my voice..and i was happy when i was singing high notes..but my mom still noticed that the songs that im singing were all about broken heart..

anyway..its either i have to give the stuff back..or to throw it all away?..what's your choice?...i just have to forget all those things..i have to..so someday..i'll be ready to risk love..

someday..i'll be ready

i've been busy lately for school stuff and i didnt notice that i havent got the time to write a post in my blog..

as i was on my way home...i have realized something..maybe if i forget all my worries and my probs..maybe life would be easier..because i always worry a lot..i didnt got the chance the open my eyes to see the beauty of life..often i always center myself to a certain topic..and the situation...but..im not minding of the other people around me...coz as long as im doing my own thing,,im good with it..like walkin in a crowded mall..i just head straight to where i wanna go..im not minding the other people..maybe my schoolmate is there..friend..classmate..no...(kinda snob huh)

maybe i have to meet new ones..open myself to them..so i wont feel like im alone...right?..but...a close friend once told me.."whenever we get hurt..we always find ways not be feel that pain again..that why the next time we found ourselves being in a relationships..we often feel SCARED..scared of getting hurt again..we lose our trust that maybe this guy may be another piece of shit that will ruin us again.."..that night when i heard it from her, it reminded me all my regrets that i've already forgotten..it keeps on bringing me back to where i was before..

have you watched this movie?..GHOSTS OF GIRLFRIENDS PAST..yeah its a nice movie..and i really loved it....so..the next time that i'll fall in love..i'll risk myself again..for the second time..did i mention?..i only risk love once in my life..even though i've been with relationships before..

maybe..when that day comes..i'll be ready to..fight for it..(coz i dont know how to fight for love now)..and no more secrets...

whenever i meet new friends..i am never the same..but something had never change..a part of me never change..maybe now i just have to focus myself to my family..to my interests..do the stuff that i love..have an adventure..and leave all the pains behind...

..i dnt know what to do anymore

speechless..i dont even know what to say anymore..i dont know how to express every detail in my mind..all i know is that..i miss him..and i miss how we spend time with each other..i was better with him..and thinking of all the things that he did for me..made me regret of how i acted..

i dont wanna love anyone else..for now..its him who my heart longs for..i kept all the stuff he gave me,,i kept them all..i love the stuffd toy he gave me..and i always wanna embrace it when i go to sleep..i got the card he gave me..the rose that i kept..it will never fade away..

for now..i just need to be alone..no matter how i feel..if we're meant for each other, he'll come back..and if he dont..i dnt know if im gonna wait for him or just..i dont know..

(-_-)

i dnt know what happened to me

everything's alright..im with myself, not with someone,,not getting close to any guy so i wont get attached..

but..

one day, i saw him..and i told myself "here we go again"..when i looked at him i feel like crying already, so i just acted like i dont care, and like we're strangers again..i dont know him and he doesnt know me..i was trying to avoid him..when i saw him, i was surprised to see him, i was shocked seeing him..while i was approaching someone that he's talking with, our eyes met, not just a glance..but i mean we stared at each other's eyes...i hope he didnt notice how i was feeling when i saw him..but then, after i asked the the person who he's talking with, i immediately turn away..when i was already in the multicab, that moment was stuck in my head, like a video tape that's played in slow motion,,

then, on the afternoon, while i was asking the lady on the table about something, i dnt know if it was just a coincidence or what, but are these things signs that he's the one for me?..but we're through, and past is past..i cnt go back..anymore..

its better this way, im alone,,no bf..i've set my priorities, and i'll turn my plans into action..no more distractions,,i learned my lesson..i dnt wanna be left expecting and loving someone that much..and the guy is staying away from me coz he thinks that its better to be apart...i wanna live happily..gain more friends, hang out with them, watch movies, go shopping and everything...i wanna make decisions for my own..and this time, i've decided..i dnt wanna have a bf yet unless im ready to be committed...

although, seeing couples anywhere i go,,make me so insecure..

i feel like leaving this place..

man, i dont wanna stay here anymore...i wanna go somewhere..have an adventure...planning some things in life already...when will i get married?..just joking..im still confused about my plans after graduation...should i work in the city?..or go to cebu/makati?...i wana run away from here...past is haunting me..everytime i thought about it..i cant help to miss those memoirs...

i dont wanna stay here anymore..i dont wanna see those people who turned their back on me..it keeps on hurting me you know..good thing if my family will always be there for me, showing their care and nurture..and everything..im insecure of my family coz they're helping each other..and no one is helping me in my self-development..

i think i dont wanna expect anything anymore..and i blame myself for my decisions..pity on me!..keep on pushing and pushing and pushing..til no one comes back...

should i have a makeover?..change myself, change attitude, change lifestyle..live a new life..forget those who have hurt me and start a new circle?..maybe i can do that..just need support to those new friends i just met..

god i miss him..and i hate it..

i miss someone..

i miss someone..someone i know...hope he misses me too...

can i act like i dont care?..but if i do,,he'll think like im pushin him away?..my blog really sucks..i dont even know what to say...you see, everytime i got nothin to do, he eventually crosses my mind..asking questions like :how is he doing right now?..is he ok?..should i text him or call him or email him?'...crazzzzzyyyy thoughts of mine..

should i just let things happen?..you see, i've been hanging out with new people..getting close to them, ask advices and everything..but they dont want me to talk about love coz it only pisses them off...although there's this someone i met a few weeks ago,.that maybe..just maybe..he wanted to court me..(his acts say so)..but i wont go beyond bounderies..he's my friend..

ohhh...how i hate missin that someone..it makes me depressed..my supervisor had noticed that i cant concentrate on my ojt..(thoughts are like racing in my mind)..keep myself busy and forget everything?..

so much for my happy ending...

man, i blew it..

some things in life cannot be taken back..so, i asked, is this a regret?..no, not another one..i dont wanna have any regrets..again...

everyday, i always check my horoscope..to be more aware of what going on in my life..esp my lovelife..yeah..but its kinda hard to predict..should i forget about it or keep hoping?...i dont know maybe im just missing the things we had before..but anyway im glad that my new close friends got my back..but im hoping that i wont miss anything..

i blew it...i really blew it..i dont know if he does really care or just busy with some stuff..but one thing for sure..i will never ever run after a guy ever again..that kinda makes me feel down..you know, when you feel like he's not sharing his life with you( not like im married)...

hope there will always be a closure..

ehehehehe...well anyway i just passed by my blog..to express some thoughts i cant really figure out..confused?..yes i am...

who are you, really?

lately, i've been confused..til now..i should have never fallen for you..my status is silent..i dont know how we've started..and i dont know if it ended..i barely even know you...so, why should you trust someone who you barely even know?..how can we be committed to someone if we dont really know our partner?..am i making any sense here?..things happened so fast..it really did..and i almost forgot how we've come this far..

maybe..just, maybe..we thought we love each other because of interests, our ideals..but..is this for real?..coz im not really feeling it.."we can have time for each other, if we will make time, there's always a way"...are you getting this?..right now, i dont know if i'll be happy, mad, or sad, or maybe just depressed and lonely..if we have to make some sacrifices, do you think in the end, all of those sacrifices will worth it?

things happen, there's always circumstances coming in our way..now, what if..while we are apart..you'll meet someone, and i'll meet someone..what if, one day you'll realize im not the one for you coz you found someone better..

is it true?that long relationship never lasts once there's no closeness between the both of you?..time is the element here..what if, time had gone without noticing it, and you realize that its already a lost love?..and the moment you realize it, that's the moment you'll realize the value of it..and how much was lost in you..

yes, i am sensitive and all of these..but..i can therefore say..that someday, i'll never care for you the way that i did..someday, i'll never ever expect anything from you..and someday i can forget you..so, i wont mind if you dont feel the same way as before,, just tell me..coz you know one minute you're making me feel like you love me, then after a few minutes, you tend to change your mood...and i dont know why...i dont know you anymore..(i thought i did)

maybe, how you treat me, is like how you treat the other girls around you..and you never noticed that you're hurting me..and you dont really get me..am i over reacting here?..am i way too deep for you and you dont like it anymore?..if it would be like that, then i guess there's too much pain now and probably this would be the end for this feeling i have for you..i just dont have time for the pain, its killing me while i try to heal myself..

dont cry to me

if you love me

you would be here with me

you want me

come find me

make up your mind

many many things happened today....but im still thankful....=)

you know what?while i was on my way to school this morning..there was a song played on the radio...and it kinda reminded me of someone....hmmmmm..."i dont wanna miss a thing' by aerosmith....its a really really great song..it was stuck in my head all day...but i hope what i had with that someone will never change..anyway, im ok with my life..and he's ok with his life..

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my practicum was settled this morning..im so glad it did..i was reassigned to another entity...but i didn't start my ojt this morning coz i still have a claz at 11:30....ehehehehe....anyways..when my immediate supervisor asked when should we get started..i said i'll start this afternoon...so for the meantime...i just surf the net again..listen to music (as usual)..then of course..visited my farmville...=D

but i didnt got the time to finish planting crops...how sad...=(..but its ok..i will still be able to level up my mastery crop....=))...

so, when i started my ojt..it was actually kinda cool..coz i was assigned in the acctg department..and my immediate supervisor told me to post items in the ledger...and i liked it...but after i finished with the task that was given to me, i tried applying what i had learned..the trial balance..then i figured out..that all the debits and all the credits is not equal..i didnt know what it happend like that so i doubled check my work...hmmm...maybe because there was no adjustments yet?...probably...that could be one of the reason..and the data was not complete anyway...

i also met someone who is also a practicumer...and used the computer im using to print out some docs...but unfortunately, there was a paper jam..that's why they were having trouble printing those docs..well, he said that he's graduating this coming october..and that he studied for 5yrs from a 4yr course...there were also some JO there...they were nice..the other one is a gay...ehehehhee...

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after that, i went to school coz i still have a claz til 8:30...imagine...in monday and wednesday i'l work whole day(8-12;1-5) then i got a claz at 5:30-8:30...and then on tuesday and thursday i'll work from 8-11, go to school coz i got a claz @11:30-1..then at 2-5 is my ojt..then at 5:30-8:30 is claz...thank goodness on friday i dont have any class or else..i'll be really really stressed at the end of the week...and i still have to study my subjects..esp acctg and mgt10b..in mgt10b we always got a recitation every meeting..but i like it..at least i can develop my communication skills...

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tonight..i mean every night this week..i feel really exhausted...maybe its coz of the situation im facing now..i think i have insomia...i cant sleep at night..there are lots of things racing inside my head...but im really thankful i got this new friends who can keep me company...i enjoy talking with them..so thank you...=)

i remember that song

Someone who's been a bit too distant -- emotionally, and perhaps even physically -- has been on your mind an awful lot. As so often happens with people as deeply connected as you two are, you've been on their mind, too. The only question now is which of you is brave enough to make the first move? Don't give them the starring role in the story that's sure to have everyone talking soon. HOROSCOPE 6-13-10

that was quite fun, and i miss it..but i get frustrated whenever i think about it..whenever i passed by the places we've gone..its always you who's popping out in my head..together with a friend..being there with me..i miss that so much..hope we've made so many memories though..i remember that night when you were singing that song "queen of my heart"..and i was there staring at you, smiling at you..

and after a couple of days, whenever i miss you, i just think about your favorite song..it makes me smile..but then as time goes by..that song is making me cry..coz missing you makes me cry..before i go to bed, that song is my lullaby..and i hugged my teddy thinking that it was you that im embracing..

i even made that video..a slideshow of pics with your favorite song on it..im hoping that..the end part of that video will also happen to us..but maybe im having too much illusions..and never thought of the possibilities that is happening now..i was too blind to see the reality coz of that love..i know you know how i loved you..

that was a long time ago though..as you said, people change..and u changed..i changed..we grew apart..and now im falling apart..

a bad day yesterday

i thought everything's gonna be alright..i thought i got nothing to worry about..today i just made a mess in my life...

we had our orientation for practicum yesterday afternoon..and surprisingly, we were the first batch that have been given new requirements..during orientation, i was making plans already on how can i accomplish them..so first, i have to make a resume and application letter to be submitted also yesterday afternoon (on the spot)..that was not the problem for me coz i can make one..then, after i submit the resume and application letter, i have to inform our dean that there was changes in the schedule of my subjects..so, the working student took my load slip to show it to the dean..but then, unexpectedly, the dean became mad coz i didnt inform her anything before i change the schedule of my subject..because of that, the pain that i've had during my high school days came back..there was a pain on my chest again, i started crying..and when i start crying while the pain wouldn't stop, its hard for me to stop crying..i dont know what's wrong with me again..but im glad that someone took care of me..

during that moment, my mind wasn't in the prob bout my practicum..but i was thinking like going to the hospital to have a check up and to ask for a medicine to calm me down..but then, i was worried that i'll faint on my way to the hospital, so i just went home..it was almost 8pm when i got home..and my mom wondered why i cried..i cant tell her much bout the story..the details will only kill me...

anyway..one way or another, i realized that..i'm not tensed talking with an authority..i face it with confidence and respect..im a good listener..and i just wanna let her know bout my side of the story..she didnt gave me the time to explain why my sched was like that..im just hopin that she'd hear me out first..and if there is a problem..i cant undo my mistakes..i didnt know what i was supposed to do..im hopin that next time she wont get mad, listen first then find solutions..and i wanna apologize if i made her lose her temper...even though she's not reading this..i just wanna express how i felt about what happened..rejection is a big thing for me..i can accept criticisms, judgments..but im finding it hard to accept rejections..especially now that im a graduating student..and i hate myself for not knowing that i still have to inform the dean about those changes in my schedule..

anyway, i'll apologize later..and thank those who helped me relieved...

gothic much?!

"dont cry to me

if you love me

you would be here with me

you want me

come find me

make up your mind"

that's the chorus of the song "call me when you're sober"..maybe im just being a gothic now..cant blame myself for being like this..anyway..why is it that most of the people hates or irritated with those who are gothics?..a friend of mine told me, that if your friends cannot accept who you really are, then you cant call them 'friends'..i mean..i think its reasonable to feel down especially when something really happened in your life, right?..

maybe others just doesnt wanna hang out with the gothic ones..coz one way or another, others are thinking that gothics are into death, suicidal, etc..and maybe others are just afraid of thinking like that or maybe they dont wanna lose their popularity or something..

i've been a gothic a long time ago, emotionally but i dont really look like one..i love gothic pics..that's why my fave color is black and bloody red..i wanna be a gothic again..here is just something about being a gothic that i feel like im attached to..but i dont know what it is, im finding it hard to identify that gothic characteristics...

so, there is another song that i love "sweet sacrifice" also, by evanescence..i wanna share its lyrics with you guys..

"Sweet Sacrifice"

It's true, we're all a little insane.

But it's so clear,

Now that I'm unchained.

Fear is only in our minds,

Taking over all the time.

Fear is only in our minds but it's taking over all the time.

You poor sweet innocent thing.

Dry your eyes and testify.

You know you live to break me. Don't deny.

Sweet sacrifice.

One day I'm gonna forget your name,

And one sweet day, you're gonna drown in my lost pain.

Fear is only in our minds,

Taking over all the time.

Fear is only in our minds but it's taking over all the time.

You poor sweet innocent thing.

Dry your eyes and testify.

And oh you love to hate me don't you, honey?

I'm your sacrifice.

(I dream in darkness

I sleep to die,

Erase the silence,

Erase my life,

Our burning ashes

Blacken the day,

A world of nothingness,

Blow me away.)

Do you wonder why you hate?

Are you still too weak to survive your mistakes?

You poor sweet innocent thing.

Dry your eyes and testify.

You know you live to break me.

Don't deny.

Sweet sacrifice. 

you see, if you just read the lyrics, i know that most of the people can relate to that..the pain, revenge..there are times in our lives that we had felt like that, right?..the only difference from that time and now is, you moved on..but for gothics, its really difficult to move on especially if what you've lost is what you really needed..

..just sharin..

untitled

i did everything that you had told me..and now i dont know what's left for me..

im not perfect..but you wanted me to be the perfect one..i did everything so you can be proud of me..i worked hard but i still dont feel like you're proud of me..or you even appreciate my hard work..others can see it, my friends, in school..but why can't you?

you lead me to a different direction in life..i accepted it..tried to love it even though its not what i really wanted..and now that i finally have the heart of it, you want me to stop..you told me to 'finish what i've started'..and now im doing it..but i feel like you're not supporting me emotionally..yes, there is no doubt to your support on financial matters, but..i just want you to realize that 'appreciation is my success'..but how?!

you have shield me from bad influences..and those who are close to me thinks that 'ITS TOO MUCH, THAT I CAN'T EVEN BREATH'..yes you were protecting me..but you wanna keep me away from my friends too..i did what you wanted..you dont want me to have a 'barkada'..you dont like it when someone is always going out..that's why im a loner..but..thinking of it..i realized that maybe you just don't wanna lose me..but im hopin you'll realize that overprotecting me will only make me wandering around and breaking the rules..

i wanna taste freedom..no worries..no curfew..im just hoping that you'll also realize..that 'barkada' is not that bad..it only depends to the kind of people you hang out with..if you're hanging out with the right ones..then its good..but if you're hanging out just to fit in..then maybe with that situation i could really get into trouble..

i wanna be appreciated..just like everyone else..they're proud of me..and i wanted you to be proud of me too..ever since i got my first achievement..i never felt like you're proud of me..its like, it was just a regular day for you..and i felt really sad, depressed..and at that time i got no one to talk to coz im not that really close to me friends..

wonder im full of secrecy?..you wanted to be strong, not thinking about disappointments, move on immediately..but in real life, it just doesnt work like that..in order to move on, you have to let it out first..time can only tell if you have really moved on from that disappointment..you didnt want me to be weak..and you taught me to ignore the feelings which is not meant to be kept but to be shown..

and now i dont know what im going to do with my life..i dont even feel like its my life..i feel like a robot..do these stuff..dont do that..but if you see me that way..maybe im a robot..a robot who has a heart that feels..and is capable of being hurt..im lost..and without you there supporting me in all aspects..i wont have freedom..thinking about this really makes me cry..but i have no choice..you have my respect..and my gratitude and you're thinking that it may not be enough..maybe one day i'll be forced to run away from you..no matter how much it will tear me apart..

i really appreciate everything that you did for me..i really do..but..please let me enjoy my life..im missing lots of things..and im always pretending that i never regret those..

i dont know what im going to do..im hopin that one day, you'll hear me out..

(,-_-,)

what a day!

woah...many many things did happen today...its the first day of class...but my class actually starts at 5:30 in the afternoon...well, i've been busy cleaning up this morning..and i really did sweat a lot..later on..while i was preparin myself..and my stuff for school...there was no electricity!..oh no!...and i still have to dry my hair before i leave...huhuhuhu...i was in a hurry of course..coz i still have to settle for a new ID..i really misplaced my ID...i didnt know where did i put i placed it...

so..thank God..the electricity was back(after 1hr, jeez!)..so when i arrived in school..after a few mins..i already got a new ID..(produced an ID for my last sem in school)..then i hang out with my batchmates in highschool which are my schoolmates too..talked and talked and talked about stuff..about what we did during our 2months vacation..(their 2months of vacation while me..just a month)...then talked about something new to their lives...it was fun actually..then..it just so happened that we have the same last class from M-TH..isnt it cool?..we have each other..and we could hang out and go home at the same time..

so there i was...surprised...coz of the new things going on in school...we actually have this new requirement..for every subject it is mandatory to have a notebook..coz it will be passed before the semester ends at the dean's office...its just bad for me..coz i really bought this cute exp envelope for my notes..and my notes will be written only in yellow papers..coz if i use a notebook, i'll just be wasting the remaining pages after the semester...right?...hayts...so i need to find a way..to save money..again...and again..and again...

but all in all...after what happend today..i still feel thankful...(though there parts in my life which is really depressing)..and anyway..i saw 11 this afternoon..oh, he's still the same, he never changes...and i feel like..he was looking at me..?...nah...maybe just my imagination playing with my mind...ahahahaha....

woah..been gone in my blog for a while...

its june..claz will start 2morow..im so excited..learning new stuff again..i've had enough troubles for the past few weeks...and i think im ready to get back on track...

i've noticed..that internet really has a powerful impact in the society..most teenagers, adults, kids..often spend their time surfing the net..playing games, checking mails, checking the msgs in a social networking sites, dating online..and what could have ever surprised me?...now, e-commerce is really IN to the business market today..there are many great advantages..and there are also disadvantages...

now, if you plan to merchandise a product, promote a new product in the market..in the INTERNET..ADVERTISING would be a great help for increasing a company's profit..one of the advantages that i identified for an e-commerce is that, you don't need to invest a big capital for your business(building, rental, utilities expense, etc.)..all u need is ur merchandise, a warehouse or a stockroom, some stuff that can be used like mannequin for clothing, accessories, and the like, and most importantly a computer....just 4 things right?..u dont need to worry bout paying bills, business taxes and licenses, etc..

i've seen many sellers spreading their advertisement all over the internet..here in the philippines, shopping online could be found at ayosdito.com, ebay.com and a social networking site: facebook.com...yes..it is that easy..(well, if you know how to manage your business well)..

BUT..there are also disadvantages for e-commerce..like..bogus buyers online..now who are these bogus buyers?..bogus buyers are the ones who reserved for an item..but then later on cancels their order due to some excuses..it really delays the transactions for the business..also..for those sellers who do 'meet ups'..sometimes the items that they are selling(especially those handy ones) can be stolen from the seller..

well..its just few things that i've learned surfing the net..hope i gave you guys some business ideas..just take a look at both sides..the advantages and the disadvantages..the risks, the circumstances, then try to balance it..then plan..organize, implement those plans, and control...that's your way to success!

the danger in lack of sleep

LONDON (AFP) – People who get less than six hours sleep per night have an increased risk of dying prematurely, researchers said on Wednesday.

Those who slumbered for less than that amount of time were 12 percent more likely to die early, though researchers also found a link between sleeping more than nine hours and premature death.

"If you sleep little, you can develop diabetes, obesity, hypertension andhigh cholesterol," Francesco Cappuccio, who led research on the subject at Britain's University of Warwick, told AFP.

The study, conducted with the Federico II University in Naples, Italy, aggregated decade-long studies from around the world involving more than 1.3 million people and found "unequivocal evidence of the direct link" between lack of sleep and premature death.

"We think that the relation between little sleep and illness is due to a series of hormonal and metabolical mechanisms," Cappuccio said.

The findings of the study were published in the Sleep journal.

Cappuccio believes the duration of sleep is a public health issue and should be considered as a behaviouralrisk factor by doctors.

"Society pushes us to sleep less and less," Cappuccio said, adding that about 20 percent of the population in the United States and Britain sleeps less than five hours.

Sleeping less than six hours is "more common amongst full-time workers, suggesting that it may be due to societal pressures for longer working hours and more shift work"

The study also found a link between sleeping more than nine hours per night and premature death, but Cappuccio said oversleeping is more likely to be an effect of illness, rather than a cause.

"Doctors never ask how much one sleeps, but that could be an indicator that something is wrong," said Cappuccio, who heads the Sleep, Health and Society Programme at the University of Warwick.

Research showed no adverse effects for those sleeping between six and eight hours per day.

that poor lil creature

when i was in a multicab..going to the downtown area..i was looking at the streets, thinking of the operations plan that i still have to make(for industrial organizations management)..i passed a lying creature on the side of the road, it's bleeding..how can a man do such a thing!that is cruel, killing creatures and not minding that they have a life too!these creatures needs to be nurtured, cared and loved by their persons, killing them will only give you a curse..i hate it when this happens, i become emotional, i mean even though i am not the creature's person, at least, can you please give some consideration that its not only us who live in this world?!

presentation! wew!

after my 9:30-11:30 class..i realized that i left something at home...my notes for the presentation at 1:30...can you believe it?..that's why as soon as the class had been dismissed, i was in a hurry, but i bought first a refreshment with me coz i am really hungry, i was thinking that maybe when i come back to school early, i can just buy something to eat...so when i got home, i looked foor my notes...i mean omg! its lost...so i just made a new one, i made edited some parts on my presentation, save it then went back to school...but when i arrived at the nearest net cafe in school to print out the literary piece and my notes, there were some delays..huhuhu..then i was in a hurry again to photocopy the piece for my classmates..then i went to the classroom for the preparation for the report..wew!..it was already 1:30pm..and when our teacher arrived, i was the one who started the report because my groupie was late..

The poem we presented is "Annabel Lee" by Edgar Allan Poe..when i comprehend this poem, i started to love the literary piece..its all about a man who really loves his wife, that even death cannot separate both of them, and that they're love wont end even after death..it is a romantic poem, an elegy, a drama..it is because the love between the author and annabel lee is inseparable, it is divine and I can therefore say that it is all about true love, a true love that is eternal...the mood of the poem is sadness, becuase he couldn't accept the death of his wife, he couldn't move on because there is something about annabel lee that cannot be explained, that cannot be forgotten, and whatever it is, it is worth loving for..he honored annabel lee..even after death...

so after what happened this afternoon..when i got home..i just realized that i haven't eaten my lunch yet..when it comes to school, i just can sacrifice anything..just anything..(what we call 'trade off') just to finish an objective..

preparing, preparing, preparing

woah, its monday, and tomorrow i already got a class...hayts..i've been having some trouble on a schoolwork, me and my partner need to observe an operations process..and there are only few manufacturers here in our place...huhuhuhu...we need to make an operations plan for r&d of the entity...and still got a defense..yikes!

so i gues i'll be busy for a while..hmmmm...still got a presentation tomorrow that i also need to prepare..final exams are comin up..on may 17 & 18 i think....well,, i'll just keep in touch to tell my story...

take care n god bless ya all...!=)

a nice poem found on a scrapbook

Someone to Love

I think a lot, while in bed at night

Wishing I had someone to hold me tight

Wishing I have someone to love and care for

But that person I thought I loved, don't love me anymore

Looks like I never felt love, but then again I am 14

I shouldn't expect much too soon, but love I've seen

Around me everyday. I see my friends not sad

They're in love, reminds me of what I had

I remember what I had, and now what I long for

Just someone to hold me, I don't need much more

I have my friends, and that's enough for now

I just want to feel special, the question is how

I need someone to hold me, and tell me that everything's alright

I need someone to be there, hold me deep into the night

This is what I long for when I look at the stars above

All i want now, all I need, is just someone to love

wew! i got it from my scrapbook in highschool...ehehehe...it's nice, isn't it?=)

history papers of my life

just after i reorganized my stuff this afternoon..i've gathered some papers with me, an important one..well, before i kinda like writing stuff, whenever i feel lonely, or maybe something awkward happened, i just write it down..and when i read those again, i started sayin "oh my god, is it me or it this writings are getting so much emotional?"..after a few mins, i started realizing that maybe 'the ones who expresses themselves are the ones who are very true to their emotions, not like others who'd like who hide their feelings so they wont say that he/she is weak'..but its kinda like im that kind of person now, i hide emotions so no one can see them..

i can be an actress or what?!just joking..well anyway, i found one poem that is so very nice, i wrote it before and i would like to share this one..its real, didnt mind the rhyming stuff, i just write a poem..i mean not a poem, a prose..hope you like it..

That Sad Voice

Jealousy had broken my trust

It burnt my faith into dust

Though situations happened so fast

Finally, i knew it was love at last.

I lay on my bed thinking

What to do if one day i caught you cheating

But i don't know why i thought such a thing

Maybe not having you here made me felt something missing.

I thought i could resist not talking to you

You called, left a voice message but only few

And it had changed my different point of view.

Your voice on the message made me realized

How true you were but i decentralized

Your affections which I had criticized.

That sad voice finally taught me

That your love was true which I couldn't see

That the love you have is the only key

Knowing if we really are meant to be.

i don't know who is this for, there was no date on the poem..hayts..but i like it, i really like it..=)

may i write something about love?

people change..?..yes we do..as time goes by..peoples changes..their personalities. their perceptions. their ideas..somehow it changes for the better, sometimes for the worst..

someone had told me..that love can change one's personality..and i believe in 8..coz it already happened to me..that change can be good for your relationship or maybe bad..but what matters most is that, you're changing for the betterment of your relationship..if someone changes..and became different because of an unresolved issue..he/she changes and become jealous or possessive (being afraid that they're loved one will leave them or afraid of the break-up)..

others say that when somebody get jealous..its because of the love he/she has for you..but too much jelousy can ruin a relationship..you become overprotective..not being able to listen what you're loved one is really saying..or maybe what is he feeling..

some people change for the better..coz they say its what they're loved one needs so their relationship will last longer...for example..in marriages perhaps, the wife and the husband make some adjustments so their love will be strong and firm..(not like i've been married before..still young..still young...=p)..

but you know what?..what i noticed in relationships is that, love can be unpredictable..circumstances may come their way..but if they're that strong enough and courageous enough to take the risk, they never stop continuing loving each other..no matter how much time would be wasted and how scary it is to take the flight..

what a strange dream..

oh...why are those dreams keep on haunting me?..imagining some stuff on my mind while i was sitting on the balcony this afternoon...with a notebook on my lap and a pen on my hand..i started writing again..

i had a dream last night..i was in a very dark place..there was a storm and cold wind..and i was outside sitting on a bench watching every raindrop fall on my hand..i can almost imagine the facial expression that i've had in that dream..its like i was empty, and it looks like i was out of my mind..there was a broken guitar on my side (but im not really a musician)..the night was cold..a guy came to me, fixed the broken guitar then played a song for me.. you know what the song is?..its "passenger seat" by stephen speaks..and suddenly i feel better..kinda like impossible in reality..but the guy who appeared in my dream is very familiar to me..just didn't know who he was..

when i woke up this morning..i never knew how i was feeling..like a bit depressed (still a bit depressed)..that's why i started writing a story..for my own..(honestly i never ever finished the stories that i've started before)..hope i get so motivated til the time its already finished..hope this wont be another fairytale story of mine..

maybe i'l start another story about pieces of experiences of my friends..

get a good night sleep

Break that bad sleep habit before it breaks you.

Long days and restless nights can be a deadly combination. No matter how stressful of a turn your life might take, your sleep is the one area you should be careful not to let suffer. If you're feeling like a full-blown insomniac lately, here's a few ways to get you back to bed.

Lose the Energy Drinks

If you're not getting enough sleep at night, it makes sense that you'd reach right for the can of ready-made energy. But since these cans are packed with lots and lots of milligrams of caffeine, the jolt lasts you a lot longer than you intend it to. That one drink could last you through bedtime -- it might give you wings, but it'll fly you right out of dreamland.

Wrap It Up

The easiest change you can make to your rest pattern is to just start your wind-down process early. Don't flop on to bed immediately after finishing an activity -- even if you're beat, your mind is still firing away. Instead give yourself a few minutes of cool down time, whether it be staring at a tv show or journaling your day. Most importantly -- don't go to your bed until you're ready to actually sleep.

No Time For Wine

Wine and other alcohol may make you sleepy at first, but once the buzz is gone it's a nightmare -- literally. A drunken sleep -- as many of us who've had long nights know -- brings troubled dreams and therefore a restless sleep. By all means, have a nice glass of red wine if that helps you wind down (it also is full of antioxidants so all things in moderation,) but stop there. Don't drink your way to sleep.

tips for a beautiful smile

A beautiful smile can boost your self-confidence. Dr. Bill Dorfman, creator of Hollywood’s hottest smiles and the featured dentist on “Extreme Makeover,” shares these tips for taking care of your teeth.

How to brush properly

• Place the toothbrush at a forty-five-degree angle against your gums. 

• Rotate the brush gently in small, circular motions. 

• Brush the outer surfaces of each tooth on both the upper and lower arches. 

• Repeat on the inside surfaces and chewing surfaces of all teeth. 

• Scrape the tongue with a tongue scraper to remove bad-breath-causing bacteria. Move it from the back of the tongue toward the front, sweeping the bacteria out of the mouth. 

• Rinse with water or alcohol-free mouthwash.

How to floss properly

• Pull out fifteen to twenty inches of floss, winding most of it around the middle fingers of both hands. 

• Hold the floss lightly between the thumbs and forefingers. 

• Use a gentle back and forth motion to guide the floss between the teeth. Once you‘ve gotten the floss past where the teeth touch each other, switch to a gentle up and down motion. 

• When you reach the gums, stop! Never “saw” into the gum tissue or you will destroy it. Instead, use an up and down motion. 

• Advance the floss so you continually use a fresh section of the floss. 

• Repeat this procedure on each tooth - even in the back.